Monday, October 06, 2008

Tears Rolling Down My Cheeks. . .

No, dear reader, I am not crying as in crying. I am crying as in laughing.

You see, I have a new collection of goofs, and whilst searching for some on-line help in explaining similes and metaphors to students, I came upon this site--go there, and laugh, laugh, laugh. Then cry.

OK--the newest batch.

What the student said----------What the student meant
new-----------------knew
thrashed---------------trashed
thrive-------------------strive
close--------------clothes
chose--------------choice
viola---------------voilĂ 
soul--------------sole
suite-------------suit
disaffecting-----------disinfecting
a custom-----------accustomed
waste-------------waist
tuff-----------tough
frevurently------------fervently*
straggles of being a woman---------struggles of being a woman
less it all be lost--------lest it all be lost

And--this sentence: How does glamour mean to you?

Well, I ask, how does it?

And we wonder why a certain governor from Alaska mangles the English language?

Kudos to all of you who bravely wove the last set of mangled English into wonderful sentences, some even in verse form. Check comments here if you missed them.

Your only assignment this time? Just read the hysterically funny metaphors here.
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*Obviously, a spelling error, but included because it was just so funny--a combination of reverently with fervently! I confess, there are times that I struggle (or is it straggle) long and hard to figure out what the student means.

12 comments:

Lynne at Hasty Brook said...

Tears are squirting out of my eyes!
So funny!

Dog_geek said...

Okay, I went to the funny metaphors page, and now my husband is wondering why I'm sitting in our office cackling to myself, and the dogs are looking sincerely concerned about my well-being.

Anonymous said...

The straggles of being a woman are really such a waist. Less it all be lost. I new I was dancing on the souls of my feet. At least I am a custom to this new suite. I frevurently thrive to make sure the close of my chose will fit.

*********

You should try reading 4th grade papers! Most aren't too bad but some . . . wow! I've got to REALLY work at it.

KGMom said...

I'll tell ya, folks (sorry, I can't seem to shake this Alaska governor thing!)--Liza Lee is mopping up. She led the pack last time with her rendition, in verse no less, of the fun errors.
Now, here we have her entry again.
Well done, Liza Lee.
Would you like an Olympic meTal?

JeanMac said...

A good laugh - thanks!

dguzman said...

Oy vey! I used to collect these kinds of manglings as well. My favorite ones were "now and days" (nowadays), "get a holt of" (get a hold of), and the ever-popular "irregardless." Ugh!

NCmountainwoman said...

Great link. It's always good to have a laugh or two.

Denise said...

Thanks for the laugh!!

Denise said...

Thanks for the laugh!!

Anvilcloud said...

Poor kids; the spellchecker wouldn't help with a lot of those words..

Mary said...

Ok, don't you think Liza Lee should win a prize?

denverdoc said...

My daughter does some interviewing of high school students applying to her alma mater, a highly rated school in the Midwest. She sent me a copy of a thank you note she received from one interviewee. She assures me this fellow was a native English speaker. I thought of your post here when I read it so I thought I'd share it with you:

Thank you for making time to interview myself and
other XXX University applicants this afternoon. Your dedication
and experience at XXX U is very endorsing.

I appreciated the opportunity to present myself to
your admissions in such a comfortable and close
circumstance. I felt very relaxed and informed after
our meeting, while able to ask several other students
from XXX U about their experiences.